Sex is the energy of creation. That energy is able to create Life and able to regenerate the self. As a matter of fact, it is able to generate a new consciousness, to uplift an individual. At the same time it is the source of degeneration and frustration for many human beings.
It is the “yes” and the “no.”
If Sex becomes a source of only physical/emotional/energetic release, a source of possession of another being, then frustration and lack of satisfaction are guaranteed.
A man could be a 5 minutes wonder with a woman from penetration to “orgasm” (release.) The woman may not be satisfied. The man is done, the woman is not. If the woman wants more, she automatically becomes a 4 letter word in the world of men. Repression is inculcated in the woman’s mind.
Our “morality” is meant for a man to be a “stud” and for a woman, a “hore.” So much for equality.
The “solution” is to ejaculate many times to be the “stud” (through artificial substances) or to become insensitive to pleasure so the man could last longer.
Both “solutions” will bring further frustration and will be toxic to the well being of man.
A woman may need to learn to pamper the ego of a man to survive in this society.
A sex addict is a frustrated individual. His vitality is continuously decreasing. The creative energy of sex is wasted out of frustration.
Even though sex is “accepted” by most modern societies, there is no satisfaction out of it. Why? The mind does not surrender to the moment. The mind controls sex life. Want proof? “According to a 2008 survey of sex therapists, sex is “too short” when it lasts one to two minutes. “Adequate” is three to seven minutes, and “desirable” is seven to 13…” We are being clocked in and clocked out, just like work! That is the mind: Numbers, analysis, division, control.
The label of “desirable” has nothing to do with the “real” experience.
What is the “solution”?
Not to ejaculate.
Then sex is no longer about enjoyment, but another “stressful” job. Watch out for the moment of no return and no matter what… do not ejaculate.
Many “mystical” traditions advise that. This “method” is applied without consideration on the student’s current consciousness. It is a sure road into frustration.
Do not forget about the worries of “pregnancy,” diseases, the use of plastic to “protect” yourself, etc… All of that, makes out of sex, a dangerous activity.
A better solution?
Negate completely what we cannot understand. The extreme.
The above is the bitter aspect of sex.
What is the sweet aspect?
When the sexual energy runs up into your head and the energy expands into the environment, Nature. We are creating new energy.
When time is limitless and the pleasurable sensation remains. When there is neither need to ejaculate nor an effort to stop it.
That is when sex becomes uplifting, for our vitality will be increased.
Because we have been programmed, conditioned with so many ideas and “moral” standards, our sexuality has suffered to the point where our minds do not allow enjoyment and the sensation of surrendering to the sexual experience.
In “mystical” terms, our “nadis” are not connecting our energetic centers. There are blockages stopping what otherwise is a natural flow.
Most individuals are unable to feel the inner energy, which is moving through sex. They are unaware.
The process of repairing our damaged sexuality is part of the “seeker’s” path.
Facing beliefs, healing emotions and erasing previous conditioning will need to be part of the job. We will need to learn to be free from the mind to truly enjoy.
In a few words, inner work is necessary. Without that inner work, anything we use as a “technique” or “method” to enjoy sex, to “enhance it” or to make it last longer, will not be natural for us.
After all, sexuality is not separated from ourselves. If we are harmonious, vital… Then our sexuality cannot be otherwise.
True celibacy comes after that point of being vital and harmonious. It cannot be before that, for then; it is only forced repression of something, which we do not know about.
Because we fear it, we reject it… because we are not willing to understand it, we will hurt ourselves.
Sex could be a slow, rhythmical dance of the senses, but for most; it is the race to the big “O.” It is about filling up the belly and not tasting the meal.