Whenever we deny who we are at one moment in time, we build our ego.
Are you violent? Did you explode in anger?
Accept it. Explore it. Observe it. Learn from it. See the consequences.
This is not what you have been taught?
The basic premise is this: A violent mind cannot be changed into non-violent by repressing violence, by condemning violence, by asking someone to “repent” and to ask for forgiveness… The violent mind will keep coming back no matter what “we do.”
We could treat someone with violence or we could treat ourselves with violence. As long as we deny that as being violence, we will be fostering greater violence. That is why it is important to BE aware.
A religion or moral teaching, could teach: “Violence is bad. You will go to Hell.”
Therefore, even though we ARE still violent, we will ACT non-violent out of fear.
We will repress violence. We will teach to others “violence is bad” even though we are still violent.
That type of hypocrisy is the consequence of a moral standard based on the separation of the apparent opposites.
“Anger is the “opposite” of compassion. Anger is bad. Compassion is good.
Therefore, reject anger. Do not allow yourself to be angry. Be compassionate.”
That is the easy teaching to “change the world into a better place.”
It is the path to inner dishonesty as well. Until we realize, become aware of it. Therefore, it is not a “bad” path.
Anger and Compassion are the same energy but extremes. They differ only in degrees (Polarity.)
If we accept our anger without further thoughts of “improvement,” we will know the other extreme, which is compassion; for acceptance means integration, Totality.
Our moral make up is meant to divide and fight against that which we consider “bad,” through violence, repression and condemnation.
If we lie to ourselves the fact that we are anger itself, then we reject it. It is that rejection the one that supports a bigger ego.
We have an image already of being “good.” If we accept that we are anger, then the image will not be true for us, therefore, we need to DO something to change that:
We ask for forgiveness, we give ourselves a “chance” to start all over again “fresh,” we invent any excuse to take us into the “holy” state… but our mind is the same violent mind.
John is an angry person. His anger destroyed many people. He thought that his anger was the way to earn respect from others. He was thankful of having that anger.
Until one day… his relationship with Susan succumbed due to that anger management problem. At that point, John became AWARE of his anger and the consequences of it.
Then, John wanted to get rid of that anger. 🙂
John joined a religious group. The teaching that he liked the most was: “Anger is bad. Get rid of it. We have the method to make you anger free.” John’s ego was glad to find such a supportive group. After all, John’s ideas were “right.”
John went through times when he thought that his anger was gone until a situation, a “test” appeared and his anger got unleashed…
John felt “bad.” He wasn’t good anymore. Now he will need to ask for forgiveness and start all over again… This time he will make “more effort.”
Because John haven’t accepted being anger when he realized about it, that anger became a greater problem.
John cannot see that his mind is rejecting anger and that is why his mind cannot change. It is rejecting part of himself.
Everything changes in Life, thus; why not John’s mind?
The “holy” John persona comes into the picture manipulating his overdue “change,” but his mind remains a violent mind.
Then John will tell everyone that “anger is bad,” that “you need to get rid of it,” only to strengthen his own dogma in his mind although he may believe to be teaching something good to others… but he will know that he cannot walk his talk. Hypocrisy arrives.
This is the same situation with sex and celibacy, greed and generosity, etc.
Ego grows with every rejection of ourselves. We may want to pursue an ideal, and that ideal is not “what is.”