Dishonesty is the only illusion


In my “career” as a “seeker” I have been involved in many paths to search “something” such as : Peace, happiness, purpose, heaven, God and the list goes on.
The above “spiritual search” is driven by the same “I’ which is looking for something different in the “mundane” such as: Wealth, power, fame, beauty, possessions, etc.

Do we see that the “driving force” is the same?
It is the “I.” Even when we say: “I am peace.”
The “I” lingers there in the background for identity. The word “I” is not “bad.” If we use it by feeling part of the Totality, then it is inclusive rather than the exclusive use that we typically give: Separation.

If I have to put everything I have learned so far in a word or phrase, that could be honesty with myself.

Why should I believe in something that I don’t feel?
Why should I believe is something that everyone else “sees as true”?

In that realization, I will honor my own perceptions.

It may be an illusion, but I want to find out by myself. Learning is included in that experience and with that a new consciousness.

Change in consciousness, does not come by accepting someone else’s explanations about life, what is good or bad. It comes through an experience that life may be offering but many times, we are not willing to open the door and experience the teaching.

For example, meeting someone for a life partnership may be desirable, but If our feelings do not agree with that, even though that experience may be desirable or “good” or any label, then that experience may not be for us yet. There is something inside which we may call “consciousness, guardian angel, superego, etc.” which could be our own measure of inner honesty.

It may be different for someone else.

The obstacle is that many times, that “guardian angel” may be surrounded by many voices inside ourselves, which are fighting for supremacy: Emotions, ego, beliefs, taboos, etc.
When we see the above, we could realize the need to “heal” from all those voices, which are not allowing us to hear that “inner feeling.”

That is what I may label, “honoring our role in life.”

Another example?
If I observe that to experience death is part of living, then why should I be dishonest with myself by believing things or doing things, which are not what I feel?

Granted. Many times it is about a compromise with “others” who may be experiencing another perception of “reality” of life, but the bottom line in my finding so far, is to still hear that inner feeling when the inner chatter and reasoning are gone.

Living life with joy, is related with learning to listen to that silent voice of destiny. The turmoil is “outside,” pushing into different directions. We could call those: Traditions, cultural and religious beliefs, emotional traumas, hang ups, etc. To respect those means not rejecting them but at the same time to hear our own pristine calling in life.

To allow life (God) to take us where we are meant to be, by listening to that inner voice; could be the greatest degree of honesty there is.
In that utmost honesty, there cannot be room for an illusion.

Thinking separates the subject and the object


A reader asked to elaborate in the following excerpt of a previous writing (“Sensual pleasure in spirituality.”)
“Thinking separates the subject and the object. It is in that separation when “loneliness” arrives. However, not only loneliness arrives but everything else that we believe to be “me.” Neediness, emotional traumas, addictions, taboos, beliefs, etc.”

Someone who I exchange sharings about topics related with ego; referred to me to one of the books by Alan Watts, “The Wisdom of Insecurity.”
He said, “I found [it] to be very powerful, especially his statement that experience, I, and the present moment are all the same.”

Do we see the “craziness” of saying that experience, the “I” and the “now” are all the same?
How many people experience that? Do we “experience” all of those things to be the same?
Honestly, no.

What separates the “I” from the experience? It is obviously a thought. Thinking. Isn’t the experience of the “I” the same as the “now”?

Do we see that there is a Totality, which has been dissected into parts by our wonderful thinking?

Could we see inter-beingness?

There is a huge, enormous difference between “seeing things intellectually” and experiencing them.
Intellectually, we could make sense as when someone describes the flavor of a meal. We could separate the different ingredients of that meal, list the quantities needed of every ingredient and even learn how to cook them using the same temperature and the same timing every single time; however, if our taste buds are unable to taste, then what happens?

Exactly the same as having intellectual understanding and not experience. A meal is meant to be eaten.
It could go down to the stomach or we could taste it, enjoy it… just like life.

Mathias, the wise tree; mentioned to Ananda at one time.
“Knowing comes through contemplation.
When you observe and respect the rhythms of Nature and learn to be part of it, then your movements will be accordingly harmonious. “
Walking, breathing, feeling.

It is in that contemplation of Nature and not in reading books how the intellectual stuff vanishes. With that; our continuous thinking which brings separation.

When you are fully aware that everything is “you” and not just a part, the “I,” or the “soul” all by itself, then that concept will be let go by our own experience of the Totality.

The “Drama of life,” which is the “now” and the experience of that Drama of life are the same. The experiencer, which is the “I” or the soul or some other label cannot be separated from everything else…
Do we see that?

How could we feel alone?
Because that consciousness of Totality hasn’t been experienced or if experienced, it is for a limited time.

It is individuality false, a mirage?
No. It is just another state of consciousness. Someone who could go from one state of consciousness into the other; obviously is not alone when alone.

The experience of Totality brings paradoxically, individuality in Totality. There are so many species of beings with a particular function in the Universe. Individuality will bring Totality as well, once that experience of being an individual cannot be tolerated anymore. In other words, when that “ego” is unbearable. That means suffering.

Collective consciousness is moving at this time into what has been labeled as “Oneness.”

However, we could do the pretty talk or we could experience it …away, in the little corner of silence… or we could experience both.
“Nothing is better than the other…” just different, for the one who appreciates every flavor/ experience that life brings, after all that flavor is “you.” :-)

Life will show us where we are


Ananda visited his family 7 months ago. His family live in another country away from here.
Mathias, the wise tree; shared to Ananda at that time:
“You may wish good bye to your father.”

Ananda understood that his father was going to experience death at any time but he wasn’t sure when.

When Ananda approached Mathias for a particular date as to when this will happen; Mathias replied: “ Friend, I hope that you don’t forget that I do not bring a fortune teller glass ball with me.” :-) A date means to wait idle for life rather than to enjoy the experiences.

At that time, Ananda gave a good hug to his father before departing…. conscious of the “last hug goodbye.” He knew that he couldn’t share that information with relatives who are not ready to understand the different threads of the Drama of life.

What for some is the opportunity to “say good bye,” for others is the chance to go into desperation or to brush that information off as “nonsense” for there is “no scientific evidence.”

Ananda’s father was losing his memory. He wasn’t able to walk very well but with the help of a cane. His activity was being reduced little by little. At 77, he was enjoying good health. In the past, he used to be very active, lover of sports and dancing. In Ananda’s memory, he is a caring and tender man, ready to enjoy life. He is “spiritual” because he knew how to enjoy life, the “now” without ever joining a religion.

Last week, Ananda’s father had appendicitis, which became infected, damaging some internal organs. He had surgery, which he survived, but the infection continued. The doctors mentioned that he has 30% chances to survive.

Ananda’s family members are sad; seeing the scene of a man hooked up to different tubes; a man who would like to go back home to relax but who is unable to eat or drink.

What to do? Where to go?

Life will present many scenes, what is important for the “life walker” is to be aware of his feelings at that time, the Now. Anything that is going on is merely a chance to look inside.
Look inside, look inside… observe the feelings that arise.

Death is not an enemy. It is not something to fear. It is not an adversary. Ananda’s father is not “losing” the battle, when life itself is around the “corner” for him.

Mathias, the wise tree; mentioned: “Remember that the best time of your father’s life is just about to start.”

Any “spiritual” knowledge about “how to behave” in life is only information, until someone experiences life itself happening to them. At that point, without inner observation the option is to “act” the rules, what it seems “good” but that may be dishonest if contrary to our own feelings and emotions at that time.

Some may call that experience of seeing a loved one at death’s door, a “test.”
Ananda feels that it is not a test when our emotions and understanding of life are aligned; but when that is not the case, it is not only a test but an opportunity to ingest sorrow and sadness for “free.”
That is lack of awareness.

How can you enjoy life under that circumstance, we may ask?
When the perspective is turned 360 degrees around, and the “indoctrination” of smelling death everywhere is not the focus of the experience, but to see that every end is a new beginning.
That is to celebrate life.

The above will be completely dishonest from Ananda’s part to share, if Ananda was feeling emotionally devastated, hurt, in pain and anger…blaming the doctors, life, God and everyone else for taking his father away from him… why.. why.. why it had to happen this way… :-)

There is no one taking anyone away. How could Ananda explain this in words? It is not an intellectual thing to understand.

Ananda is discovering that his work for the past year on his emotions is paying off. Many posts have been shared already on that.

Thoughts will appear such as: “ You should feel sad and cry… your father is dying, don’t you see it? What an insensitive son you are!
The thoughts are allowed to exist but there is no identification with them. In observation, those thoughts dissolve and become the past. Simply become aware of them, thoughts are not you.

Mathias the wise tree, would call that “to embrace the bloody Buddha” that is to embrace even those things which are thought of as “negativities” in ourselves, just to give it a label.
It is a discovery “about us,” which cannot be rejected into the duality of “good and bad.”

As his father, Ananda will have a new start in life tomorrow. He is moving to another place!
Life continues on… The day is bright and sunny outside for those who are able to see it, to enjoy that scene means to live in the “now.”

When we observe that we are no longer theory but we live our words, is definitely a day to celebrate!
Cheers for inner honesty and for the new beginning of father and son!

Until Thursday… :-)

What is the point of living?


Rodney, the “daredevil” has a life path. His reckless driving comes from his nature expressed at a particular point in time.

Any outside force such as a belief system to make Rodney “good,” will only repress that daredevil nature.

Once the belief is over, the repression will go away and with that his daredevil nature will be unleashed.
That belief gave him “safety” by delaying the expression of his nature, which could get him into “trouble.”

However, as we know, every experience is beneficial, trouble or not, it is a game in the nature of immortality.

If that repression took place for 10 years, obviously his daredevil nature will be tamed out of age, (getting old) which will give Rodney a different consciousness.

Note how the particular path that will be experienced in Rodney’s life is completely “out of his hands.”
Rodney may go to jail for life. He may experience many accidents or he may not experience nothing at all but a few traffic tickets here and there.

It is all in his destiny… When we see this, we start trusting life and with that, a smile in the face appears. :-)

Any “Life teaching” is just theory until someone has experienced that teaching in his life. Then he can understand the teaching and verbalize it. That is how there are different levels of “Life students” according to their consciousness, the beginning stage is duality. “This is good, that is bad. This is wrong, that is right.”

At the same time, do we see that nothing experienced is “good or bad” in itself, but just another tool that life has to change our consciousness? There are consequences, of course which are material for further lessons. Do we see that because we are inter-related, a change in a person will affect others as well, who are closely related with that person?

It is the domino effect.

Consciousness is eternal. The “soul” is eternal. Matter is eternal (cannot be destroyed neither created) then we may realize this:
Why some individuals put so much emphasis in destruction? The Armageddon is near…
Obviously because their consciousness does not allow them to see how everything is eternal. Everything changes but it is eternal.

To put emphasis in destruction is like living life with fear to die at any moment.
“Don’t enjoy now because you are going to die anyway and you should worry about your future, about what happens after you live this life.” “You will be in a better place than this world, Paradise… but you can lose it if you don’t do enough to deserve it.”

The fear of death is used as a powerful motivator for an ego to “do something” about it.
You need to get salvation and to save others as well… so you get a “golden star” in your chart of your ego-good-deeds…

However, that individual does not realize about his own immortality. That individual is unwilling to trust life and the experiences in it when is trapped in duality and the belief that “this is good and that is bad.” His ego wants a better ” heavenly job” in the “future.” A place near the CEO, God… That ego must survive for the future through repression now!
That is the irony.

Destruction in Nature, is another way to re-create again. Suffering is another way to learn about the “I” and the extension of it in our lives. Suffering is how we realize about that “I.”

Everything is as it should be. That is the perfection of this experience, which we call life.

Someone may ask: “What is the point of life if we are going to die?”
A: To discover that there is no death when the “I” dies. Living life is the path to that discovery.
Q: If there is no death, what do we do, what is the “right thing to do “ in life?

To enjoy every moment of it as it “is.” That requires a different consciousness.

Is it the time to walk by yourself?


Rodney, a 20 something year old man drives his car in a very dangerous way. He loves danger. That is his consciousness. Even though he knows that he may get traffic tickets or even injuries or death due to his reckless driving, he will continue with his “nature.”

In his path, he had a couple of serious accidents. Rodney tamed a bit and as he got older, his consciousness changed into a “secure driver.” At that point, to drive dangerously wasn’t him anymore.

Do the laws, fines and other consequences changed Rodney’s “nature”?
No. They could have changed his behavior, but his “nature” was there waiting for the opportunity to be unleashed.

If we change the scenario and Rodney went to jail for life due to killing some people in his reckless driving, Is it possible for Rodney to change his consciousness?

You bet. It wasn’t the punishment of being in jail, which was just a consequence of his actions, but it is the experience that Rodney went through. He was able to see the relatives of those who died. They were very angry and sad at the same time. Rodney realized that he was the cause of that. Rodney could feel guilty and that heavy weight will add traumas in his life, which will change his “nature.” At the same time, those relatives will learn a lesson about the uncertainties of life. That experience will change their consciousness, their lives. They may become bitter, but then they will need to heal once that bitterness is unbearable.

If we change the scenario again and Rodney “dies” due to his reckless driving, that scenario will be a teaching for his relatives and loved ones. The teaching will be interpreted according to where they are in the path of life. For some it will be about detachment, for others, it will be about loving the moment by being aware for it will go away… There is change in consciousness. As far as Rodney is concerned, his story hasn’t finished in death… It is something to be continued…

If I know that, in which moment could I utter the childish judgment of “Rodney is bad or Rodney is good”? There is a story, which goes beyond Rodney. That story will touch many lives because we live in relationship, interbeingness. As a matter of fact, for those who are unaware of the perfection of life, they will label the story of Rodney as “bad luck” or “God punished him” or some other story.

For an aware individual, every experience is the opportunity to learn something and thus, to change consciousness. Going from individuality into Totality is not something that happens by “doing things” or reading books. It happens when the time arrives for every individual. In the meantime enjoy! Every experience is meant to take us there, thus those experiences cannot be labeled as “waste of time.”

It is highly paradoxical.

The single most important item to recognize in our readiness to change, is to be able to perceive fear in us.

Fear will not allow us to explore, to find out, to experience. If there is a religious belief about “this is the only time that you have to become “good” or “pure” or angelical, before God judges you.” Perhaps now we could recognize the value of being in that predicament.

It will allow us to take action in one direction so we could feel protected, to experience something different, to empty our minds from previous “mainstream” stuff; but paradoxically, the moment that someone recognizes that he is moving in life out of fear, then everything changes once we are able to face that fear. There cannot possibly be joy in life when there is fear. If there is no joy, there cannot be love.
At that point, consciousness has changed, and with that a new perspective will be born… a “new” you.

Fear is used as a very powerful motivator.
Fear of losing a job. Fear of “losing” a loved one. Fear of dying. Fear of being alone. Fear of not being good enough. Fear of not reaching heaven. Fear of being punished by God. Fear of being in hell forever, etc.

It is when we are willing to face each one of those fears and be able to explore and find out for ourselves with that inner honesty, which is not looking to please anyone, how growth starts…

The baby who was happy in his cradle under the loving care of his parents, went over the fear of walking by himself…For him, the time to walk by himself has arrived. :-)

Want to be “good”?

calvin and hobbes heaven

If the article shared yesterday made sense, we could see that to be caught up in the duality of “being good and being bad” is illusory.

Let me put it succinctly. There is nothing “bad” in life for every experience; every single one of those experiences have benefit for the “life walker.” The issue comes when the “I” has desires, projects and expectations to achieve in this lifetime and life does not go according to his “master” plan. That we call suffering; we call it “bad.” Nothing wrong with making projects or having desires, but to know that when the “I” separates itself from the sea of life, duality will be experienced.

Thus, if there is nothing “bad,” what do we call “good”?
That realization is the beginning of acceptance of life as it is without judgment, without opinions, without “mind-full-ness” and thought to analyze things and to dissect it as to invite duality again.

Therefore, there is no need to work on “being good.” All we need to “do” is to get the “baggage”(beliefs, hang ups, taboos, emotional issues) healed and for that we may need to observe the “self.”

Every child has a different personality, but there is no one who could be labeled as “bad.”
A selfish personality is not “bad.” It is acting according to his perception of life, which in turn will bring consequences, which will be felt by that “selfish” being.
That suffering being experienced is not “bad” but the teaching, which is known as “settling karma,” which came about because that person was living according to his nature and not according to an intellectual teaching on “how to be good” in life.

When we live according to our nature, every lesson in life brings a transformation in consciousness.
When we live life according to what a book or a commandment taught us, there is no change in consciousness but just change in activity.

A religion may teach: “You shall not get angry.” If the nature of an individual is to get angry; then the teaching will merely suppress the expression of anger. Although, from the outside it may look as if the person has changed, in reality he has not. Anger is still in him. His consciousness hasn’t changed because his nature is the same.
Life experiences will teach that individual through suffering. Every being goes through that path.

To be honest is to realize that game that we are playing with ourselves.

Is duality “bad”? No. it is just a perception coming from a particular consciousness which is not aware of how “life works.”
When the “I” separates itself from everything else, that “I” is unable to perceive the unity, the wholeness. It is in this consciousness when a personal God is needed with commandments and rules on how to be “pure” or “good” as to change the outside behavior when the inside remains the same.

A being of light projects non-duality without using that label. Non-duality is something to discover. It cannot be taught. It basically means acceptance of life by belonging to it without a particular label.

If “I” consider myself to be a Christian, I will act and think in duality for an automatic rejection of everything else which is not Christian, will follow. If “I” consider myself some other label, rejection will happen to that which is not the label. That is how we could understand how an “angel” belongs to the Totality and not to a particular belief system.

To understand this intellectually will not make a change in our consciousness, it needs to come naturally as if we have a “new life” of unlearning previous concepts. That means a new consciousness.

When the great Tao is forgotten,
goodness and piety appear.
When the body’s intelligence declines,
cleverness and knowledge step forth.
When there is no peace in the family,
filial piety begins.
When the country falls into chaos,
patriotism is born.

Tao Te Ching Ch 18

Trapped in “good and bad.”


A reader asked about why this thing which we call “bad” exists, if everything in life is beneficial?

Trapped in the perception of duality, our consciousness only knows about “good and bad” when morality appears to pretend to correct that which seems damaged.
When that consciousness resides in the belief of the individual separated from everything else, then a fight will begin with “others” but especially within the “self.” That is known as a fragmented personality.

“This is right, that is wrong. This is good, that is bad. God is good. The devil is bad. Life is good, death is bad”

if the above is not enough, let us add some other labels to keep dividing things: “ Democrats are good, liberals are bad. Christians are this and Hindus are that… etc.

One commercial mentioned: “ …And remember the most important item in this relationship is YOU.”

When many customers appear, there will be many YOU’s who will fight among each other for supremacy.

Any philosophy or religion, which supports the idea of the “I” without considering the “reality” of Inter-beingness, is just a beginner path.

That is how “I think therefore I am” came up. When we perceive that consciousness changes all by itself and thought is not something which happens willingly but something which is experienced as the consciousness of individuality becomes stronger by being more fragmented, then ego is born and then that same ego-conscious mind ironically, wants to solve the state of alienation, separation which brings loneliness, depression and such states of being.

It is that kind of mentality which looks for salvation, for a better life in the afterlife, and for a God that could hear all about his miseries of being a separated entity in the Universe.
As long as that consciousness perceives separation, it cannot bring unity with all to its awareness.

That same mentality will search for “scape goats” for something to blame out of ignorance. In the duality of pleasure and pain, our society has selected pleasure as “bad.”
“Pleasure is the culprit, the cause of not being ‘pure’.” Sex is bad. “Humans have organs to reproduce but that is a temptation from the devil…”

The issue is not sex nor pleasure but the consciousness of the individuals involved.

An individualistic, ego centered consciousness cannot find that the issue is its own separation from the Totality and rather than become one with it by feeling life and being honest with his intentions, that individual rather rationalize things, think about “pros and cons” to trigger duality, separation… that personality wants to dominate, to control everything to support beliefs about its own existence now and the afterlife.

When that ego centered consciousness wants to “become good” then rejection is born towards that which is considered “bad” then that rejected thing will appear strongly…then the fight, the inner battle will be there.
A belief to “stick with the battle” against our true sentiments is proof of our dishonesty in life.

Because there is no battle. Nothing to fight for when we become open to life. It is that “I” who does not allow for change to happen.

Openness to life, acceptance, spontaneity, appreciation, gratefulness and joy are the “keywords” to live by in a different consciousness. No beliefs or religions in this. It is experiential, fulfilling right now… and not in the afterlife.

Good, bad, right , wrong, etc. were just tools for the “little kid” to start his “growing up” process in awareness.
Some may stay there all their lives… however, everything in life is beneficial. :-)